5 Practical Ways to Build a Mom Village

Stepping into motherhood is perhaps one of the most transformative life experiences a woman can experience. its large, its messy, chaotic, and at times unsettling which is why we know women need all the support they can get during this time. But what do you if you don't have that support system or village nearby. You have to create one- its not easy but its necessary. And creating one does not always have to mean paid help (although that definitely does help). When I was in the trenches of early parenthood, these are some ways I found my "Village".

Local Libraries

Your local centers are usually chalk full of activities for young kids from reading time to music classes. These are a low pressure way of connecting with other moms in a similar life stage to you because you already have one thing in common, your kids! These also tend to happen at the same time every week so I knew that it was a way for me to hang out with other moms and not have to schedule it myself.

Neighborhood Mom Groups

Finding other moms in the same stage of life as me made me feel so much less alone. I found that neighborhood whatsapp groups or facebook pages were a great place to meet new moms. Even posting something as straightforward as "Hey, I'm a mom to a X month old and would love to connect with other moms with kids around the same age" garnered many responses. It's clear that moms needing each other is pretty universal.

Playground

With each passing time we went to the playground, I would see the same moms and their kids. The predictability of knowing I would see the same moms made making a connection easier. And if a mom ever asked to hang out outside of the playground, I always said "Yes,I'd love to" and schedule it there rather than just saying I'd like to. 

Mom Apps

Having a village for me didn't always mean someone physically there for me but it could also just be support from afar. Apps like Peanut were great because I could ask questions or share how I was feeling and know that I could get valuable information, advice, tips and tricks. I also did end up meeting a few moms who lived in my area through the app.

Paid Village

Last but not least, if possible, is to pay for your village. While this may feel indulgrent, it shouldn't be seen as one. It's an investment in your wellbeing which in turn is your family's wellbeing. This can look like whatever your family needs whether that is a baby sitter, a cleaner, food delivery services, etc. I have found that when I am able to take something off my plate in some capacity, I am much more present and regulated for my family, which in turn is priceless.

Building a village isn't easy but its a necessity and there is more than one way to build one in a way that works for you.